12. Discovering that you are a creator, an artist

“Fail. Stand up. Discover the creator, the artist in you even if sometimes it’s scary.”

IF YOU see yourself as a creative, do not give up. If you believe that you are an artist, embrace and nurture your craft. If you think that every cell of your body directs you to do more, to work on your passion, to reach the farthest limits of your imagination, try. And if an idea pops up in your head out nowhere, while you’re brushing your teeth, while taking a bath, while pouring tomato sauce on your plate to make your special dish, while walking, jogging, or sprinting, while waiting for the one that you love in a cafe, Japanese restaurant, or on a bench somewhere, while reading a book, or while riding a bicycle, a car, or a seesaw in a park, listen.

The world is filled with people who call themselves artists and poets and writers but do not know when to listen and be brave enough to spend their time to give their art its own form, life, and space. They do not want to feed themselves with new perspectives. Everyone is born a creator but not all of us are courageous enough to face its inexplicable faces, its inescapable enigma.

Fail. Stand up. Discover the creator, the artist in you even if sometimes it’s scary. I know because it frightened me to write this.

But we both know that there’s no other way.

Sa ating dalawa

umuulan…
nasaan…?

ilang tula na rin ang naialay at naisulat
habang sa isipan ngiti mo’y nagmumulat
kung anong sunod na sasabihin at
bibigyang-buhay

ilang beses nang pinilas ang mga pahina
ng kuwaderno na minsan mong hinalikan
nang mabasa ang pangalan na, oo, sa
nakalipas na panahon ay walang
sawang binigyang-kulay

ginamit ang mga titik upang malaman
ang umpisa at malirip ang mga kalaliman
ng pagsinta na nagliyab sa pagasa nang
isang beses ay pinigilang umalis sa harapan –
“Nandito ako…”

ang sabi mo noon, ngunit narito hanggang
ngayo’y naaalala ang mga pangako ng pagiisang
dibdib, ang paghamak sa mga yugto ng
nakaraan na itinuring na walang
puwang kahit anino

ng namamagitan sa atin, ngunit hindi…

isang araw sinabi mong babalikan mo siya
at aasa ng magisa sa pagtanggap niya,
sa yakap niya, sa muli niyang paghagkan,
sa tinig na noong una’y kinamuhian mo’t
pilit binura sa isipan, nang
tuluyang kumawala

at heto, muli, ako’y binabati ng mga patak ng
ulan, tinatanong kung nasaan ka, kung
anong nangyari sa ating dalawa
at kung paano wawakasan sa
huling titik ng ‘yong
pangalan

aasa…

Bago pa man

Nahumaling bago pa man nalaman ang pangalan,
Bago nginitian nang magkasalubong sa daan,
Noong wala pang ibang kakilala o kaibigan,
Bago pinisan ang mga bituin sa kalangitan.